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Sunday, January 12, 2020

A mother joins her son

Many of you knew me when Grant and I lived in West, North and East Africa. Many of you were there for me when he passed away two years ago. Thank you!


Grant's mom, Pam outlived her older son. This is not natural and she took his death much harder than I did. In May last year, Pam turned 90 and my sister-in-law, Shelley (my birding mentor and best friend) and I arranged to have a big party for Pam in the retirement center in Marquard.


Pam's 90th birthday 11 May 2019

In the photo  (starting with me at left) is Pam's "younger"   sister, Carole who's 77. Gill her other younger sister, 84. Shelley, the other daughter-in-law. Charles, the only remaining son. Angus, grandson and Bruce, grandson. Great-grandchildren: Liam with me, Joel next to Pam and Abbey kneeling in front.

Charles, wearing the kilt,  played the bagpipes at the party later. It went down very well with the old ladies.

I saw Pam for the four days I spent in Marquard early November. I noticed she had become very frail and the home's sisters told me Pam wasn't coming out of her room much, except to eat lunch once a day.

Two weeks before Christmas she had a sore on her toe. The Doctor treated her for three weeks; it was gout due to high acidity in her bloodstream. I spoke to her last Monday and she said she's in a lot of pain but getting better.

Last night Amanda, my DIL phoned me and said the doctor had contacted her and said Pam was being taken to hospital in a nearby town. She had complained of severe abdominal pains and couldn't swallow.

I didn't think it would help to phone the night staff. But at 7am this morning, I phoned the nurses station and asked after Pam. The staff member I spoke to put me through the third degree. Asked who I was. And what was my relationship to Pamela Elizabeth Hedges. When she was satisfied I was Pam's daughter, she conferred off phone with someone else in her office. Then came back and said: I'm sorry my darling. Your mummy passed away at 9.28 last night.

Apparently they were about to send a policeman to Angus' home to give him the news.  I told them it's OK. I'd notify the family.

Although I had expected the worst, it was still a great shock to actually hear Pam had passed away.

Rest in peace, Mum


12 comments:

  1. Sorry to hear this, Jo, prayers and hugs as you go through yet another loss.

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  2. Hello Jo, I am sorry for the loss of Pam. Wonderful photo and post. Prayers for you and your family.

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  3. Oh my dear Jo. I am shocked and surprised. Dear Pam seemed to have the strength and fortitude of several women put together and somehow I thought she would go on and on. I know having lost Grant and now Pam it will seem like a huge void. Strength, love and hugs to you dearest Jo. xx

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  4. Sad news but sure she will be remembered fondly. Thoughts are with you. RIP. Diane

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  5. So sorry to hear the sad news, you have my condolences Jo.

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  6. Nice post you wrote about your MIL's passing away ! Living til 90 is not so usual so she had a long and as I remember quite interesting life ! May she rest in peace now.

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  7. My condolences.
    And a hiss and spit at the hospital for taking sooooo long to notify family.

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  8. So very sorry for your loss. Hugs and prayers.

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  9. Oh that's so sad Jo. As matriarch of the family Pam will be sorely missed. I like to think, as I'm sure you do, that she will now be reunited with her and your beloved Grant 💛 Big hugs from the other side of the world xox

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  10. Sorry to hear you have had bad news. They look a lovely family.

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  11. Sorry for your loss. Glad you have a large loving family to support you in this sad time.

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Thank you for visiting my blog and taking the time to leave a comment. I appreciate your feedback. Jo